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:: gentle reminders ::

October 8, 2011

This past week I found myself having a conversation in which the other party was upset and circumstances outside of their control. My initial response was, “Why be angry? It is more work to be upset about it then to release and be free of that conflict.”

In the irony that is my life, it turns out that I need to practice what I preach.

I had a gentle reminder not to let my feathers get so ruffled this weekend. After a busy week of work, coaching, gymnastics and doctor appointments I admit that I was a little frazzled. When I received some negative feedback about an assignment I was working on for university I was hurt, insulted and, well, I cried.
Between sniffles I managed to question myself. “Why am I even upset about this? Will it matter if I get a 60 or a 90 on this assignment 2 years from now? 2 weeks? 2 days? Does it really matter to me if someone I have never met does not feel my input is valuable?” The resounding answer to these questions was no. No, it does not matter. So why do I let myself get so caught up in it? Why must I perseverate on situations beyond my control and strive for perfection in the midst of chaos?
When I am putting these borders on myself as to what is ‘the right way’ and what is ‘perfect’ I do nothing but stress myself and my family. There has to be a point where I can say, “It’s good enough” and be proud of what I have accomplished versus upset that it could have been improved just a little bit more.

This morning I woke up thinking to myself that I felt neither thankful or giving.  All because I was allowing a tiny little pebble of discontent work itself into a boulder in my mind.  Reflecting on this interaction made me pause and realize that I need these gentle reminders every now and again.  Little ripples that remind me to exhale. breathe. let go. There are things beyond my control, all that matters is that I do my best and do what I know is right.

Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset.
– St. Francis de Sales
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